It was the end of class 12th exams and I was all excited to enter my college life! After spending a decade in the boarding school, I had mixed feeling. A concoction of nostalgia and excitement. The feeling to part from friends and the nervousness to step out into the world had submerged me.
After scoring good grades, it was time to decide about which course to pursue further. Belonging to the commerce stream, I had a lot of options to choose from. Whether it was English honors, BBA and B COM etc.
As usual in this confusion, parents tend to play an active role. They try to push you towards the course of their choice. This makes it or the more confusing for the child.
Compared to the others, I was lucky enough to not face this. I was not under the pressure of pleasing my family and self at the same time.
Saved!
My parents had always been supportive. They agreed to my choice of studying journalism and mass communication. Determined and focused, I was happy to see them respect my decision.
Once I got over taking this decision, I chose the most famous college to pursue my course. As I scored good grades, I got through one of the best colleges in the city.
It all started from here…….
The passage of time had made me sync into the college environment. I had learned to stay without my boarding friends and used to hang out with the new ones here.
Within no time, I had made some great set of friends and was living life to the fullest. I was at the milestone of my career all set to live up to my passion!
For casual hanging outs, we also used to have occasional parties. This even included some secret parties off campus. Life was at its peak of happiness and contentment. Sailing in this phase, I had no clue my life would turn into something, I had never imagined.
It was the night of Wednesday 2008. My friends and me were to attend a secret birthday party. After entering the premises, I realized it was not the usual one, I had attended all this while. Flowing into the ambiance, I started to follow the others. Just to not feel out of place and get mocked.
One of my friends offered me a cigarette. I declined the offer. Those were his words-One smoke won’t make a difference! I picked the cigarette and started to take the drag in. I could feel it choking me, but to be a so- called stud kept puffing drags. As said one won’t make a difference.
The night got over, but it was the beginning of my destruction by myself. Henceforth, I became part of all such parties and increased my intake of tobacco. From one smoke I reached to 10-20 a day. I had become an addict by the end of my first year. I had lost interest in everything. I could not see the drastic change in my behavior. I became restless and even bunked classes, to quench the thirst to smoke.
Observing me in this state, my friends tried to explain and take me out of it. But, my detest and the addiction, did not let me stir out of this whirlpool. By this time I had reached a stage where it was difficult to explain or even control me.
Every time I reached to light a cigarette, I used to tell myself one won’t make a difference. This made me end up to this stage where I got detected with cancer in the third year of college.
In this last stage of cancer, I do not want to make you count dos and don’t of cancer or even the ill effects of them. Spilling my story over this confession blog, I wanted to share my experience. I want people to know that it is not the surrounding that will come and save you or stop.
You need to understand and listen to the inner voice of yours. It is you who can kindle and restrain the self for right and wrong at such points in life. I do not blame the friend who offered me the first cigarette. He just offered did not force me into it. The entire world is full of lucrative offers of all kinds, you need to see which one is for you and which one is not.
I goofed it up by not taking it for fun and closing the chapter there and then. Instead, I took the false notion of fitting into the group more than my life. I had three options to choose from.
First-I could smoke the cigarette and end it not trying again!
Second-I could deny straight away!
Third-I would take it up as the regular habit and became an addict.
The Internet today has made every information accessible within few clicks. So, I will not elaborate on the bookish knowledge of it all. By my experience, I want to help people overcome those weak moments and not end up their life like me!
I hope my story helps save a few lives and not burn the life gifted to us by our own hands!
Avoid Addiction! Save Life!